Sit back and relax as you enjoy this week’s Sports Shorts.
David Stern has asked Mark Cuban to apologize more directly to Kenyon Martin's mother. While he’s at it he may also want to apologize to anyone who’s ever wasted five minutes of their life reading his blog.
Michael Phelps won his first two events at the Charlotte UltraSwim. It’s nice to hear he’s smoking the competition for a change.
Tony Romo was recently spotted leaving a steakhouse in Dallas carrying a bottle of 21-year-old single malt Scotch. We hope for his sake the Scotch has aged better than Jessica Simpson.
Former NBA star Corrie Blount has been sentenced to one year in prison after being caught with 29 pounds of marijuana. Or, as Ricky Williams calls it, a single serving.
Federal investigators recently questioned Jose Canseco’s high school baseball coach. Not about steroids, they just wanted to know how anyone could stand to be around him for four full years.
Chad Johnson received some good news and some bad news today. The good news is the NFL has agreed to allow him to have the name Ochocinco on the back of his jersey. The bad news is the front of the jersey will still feature the name Bengals.
The Minnesota Timberwolves are interested in bringing back Kevin McHale. After all, he IS the team’s second best forward.
Anaheim Ducks GM Bob Murray accidentally hit a woman with a chair following his team’s loss to the Red Wings. The incident is expected to fetch him 2,000 minutes in the penalty box.
The Yankees are selling containers of game-used dirt to their fans. Wow, and I thought New York was only losing ground in the standings.
Jerry Bruckheimer is interested in buying the Sacramento Kings. Luckily his experience directing Pearl Harbor has prepared him well for epic disasters.