Sit back and relax as you enjoy this week’s Sports Shorts.
Jessica Simpson is currently renovating Tony Romo’s home in Dallas. You can always tell when a blonde has been working on your house because all of the shingles are on the inside.
Cardinals coach Ken Whisenhunt says that he’s still standing behind quarterback Matt Leinart. Well sure, someone has to be there to hold his beer funnel.
Alex Rodriguez was booed mercilessly last night in New York… and that was just by the women he’s been double-timing.
The Yankees plan to charge as much as $1,923 a pair for the seats at Yankee Stadium when the venue closes at the end of the season. On the positive side, you’ll no longer have to watch the Yankees while you’re sitting in them.
Hurricane Gustav has sent the Hornets fleeing out of New Orleans. The last time the team saw something huff and puff this much it had “Magloire” written on the back of its jersey.
Indians outfielder Grady Sizemore hit two home runs against the Tigers last night to join the 30-30 club, or the 30-30-30 club if you include the Indians’ win total.
The LPGA will require all players to speak English starting in 2009. Fortunately, players will still be allowed to swear in their native tongue when they slice a ball deep into the woods.
Good news out of Indianapolis, where Colts quarterback Peyton Manning has been taken off the physically unable to perform list and put onto the physically unable to perform without whining list.
Tampa Bay Rays rookie third baseman Evan Longoria will resume hitting this week. No word yet on when the Yankees will follow suit.
Knicks point guard Stephon Marbury has reportedly paid $45 million for his own private jet. It’s the perfect purchase for a man whose career has been in a holding pattern for the last three years.
Tom Brady has agreed to conduct a passing camp at Gillette Stadium for $23,000 per participant. Campers will learn about long passes, shuttle passes and most importantly, how to make passes at supermodels.
Agent Scott Boras claims that the contract signed by his client Pedro Alvarez with Pittsburgh just two weeks ago is invalid. It’s hard to know who to believe: an agent or a group of Pirates.
O.J. Simpson was reportedly knocked to the ground by his eldest daughter. And here’s the really surprising part: it wasn’t during a pay-per-view fight.
The NFL has decided to extend instant replay to cover field goals, extra points and illegal forward handoffs. Now Dolphins fans will be able to watch their season fall apart over and over again.