Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Weighing in on Prince Fielder

Congratulations to Prince Fielder. The larger-than-life first baseman has become one of the wealthiest players in Major League history after signing a nine-year, $214 million deal. That may sound like a lot of money until you realize that Fielder spends $20 million a day on breakfast alone.

I don’t want to insinuate that Fielder is overweight, but the last time he saw 90210 was when he looked down on his bathroom scale.

Kudos to the Tigers. Not every team is willing to invest in a player whose cholesterol count is 500 points higher than his batting average. However, you do have to question the wisdom of signing a slugger whose strike zone is roughly the size of Wyoming.

Hopefully it will all work out. But if it doesn’t, at least the Tigers will be able to use Fielder’s jersey to cover the infield during rain delays.

Elsewhere in sports, I was sorry to hear about the passing of Joe Paterno. It’s sad news for Penn State and even sadder news for LensCrafters. Apparently JoePa was just two days away from buying his first new pair of glasses in 73 years.

You’ve been a lovely crowd. Good night!