In The Spotlight

Oklahoma City point guard Russell Westbrook has come a long way since high school. “I didn’t dunk for the first time until the last game of my senior year,” he sheepishly admits. “I didn’t really start dunking regularly until college.” Now, three years into his professional career, Westbrook regularly challenges some of the NBA’s top players with a dizzying array of rim-rattling slams. His ability to break down defenses and penetrate at will has transformed the Thunder into one of league’s most fearsome teams and has this high-flying finisher on the brink of superstardom. Learn more about Westbrook by clicking here.

In The Spotlight

2010 has been a year to remember for Kevin Durant. Over the past 12 months, this 22-year-old forward has won an NBA Scoring Championship, made his first All-Star team, guided the Oklahoma City Thunder to a 27-game improvement, and captured gold at the FIBA World Championship. It’s no wonder, then, that basketball fans around the world are anxiously awaiting to see what “K-Smoove” will do for an encore in 2011. Learn more about this emerging superstar by clicking here.

You've Got To Be Joking

Sit back and relax as you enjoy this week’s Sports Shorts.

Tigers pitcher Dontrelle Willis has been placed on the DL with an anxiety disorder. You’d be nervous too if your team’s key off-season acquisition was Adam Everett.

Kevin Durant has said he wants to be in Oklahoma for a long time. Then again, even a week feels like a long time in Oklahoma.

Plaxico Burress is allegedly frightened of spending the next three and a half years in jail. Then again, show me someone who isn’t scared of going to prison and I’ll show you someone whose sphincter sees more traffic than the Holland Tunnel.

Jerry West has rejected the Los Angeles Clippers’ request to help turn around their franchise. Instead, West plans to focus on a far less challenging project like turning Smurfs into gold.

Professional golfer Annika Sorenstam is reportedly pregnant with her first child. For those of you keeping score at home, credit her husband Mike McGee with a hole in one.

NFL commissioner Roger Goodell wants to expand the season to 18 games. His proposal has been received warmly by fans across America, including thousands of sadomasochists living in Detroit.

Former Kentucky Derby winner Alysheba was euthanized over the weekend. In related news, Wal-Mart will have glue on sale all week long.

NBA owners have approved a rule change whereby teams that have an extra player on the court will now receive a technical foul. The change could be devastating for the Sacramento Kings who have been playing with nine men at a time just to stay competitive.

The Detroit Tigers have upset some Roman Catholics who are unhappy that the club's home opener against the Rangers is scheduled during holy hours on Good Friday. We can hardly wait to see their reaction when Texas nails their pitching staff.

Joba Chamberlain’s fastball is nearly 10 miles per hour slower than it was last year. If it drops off anymore the Yankees are going to have to start timing it with a calendar.

Michael Vick has reportedly been working on a book while in prison. In fact, it should be completely colored in another week.

A minor league baseball club is selling a 1.7 pound hamburger that comes with lettuce, tomato, nacho cheese, chili, salsa and crunched tortilla chips. In related news, David Wells has just signed with the team.

You've Got To Be Joking

Sit back and relax as you enjoy this week’s sports shorts.

Florida football coach Billy Donovan may need to undergo back surgery to repair a host of disc, vertebrae and ligament problems. In related news, Notre Dame coach Charlie Weis may need to undergo extensive plastic surgery if he ever hopes to show his face around South Bend.

Chicago Bears star Brian Urlacher has admitted that he has an arthritic condition in his back. We always suspected playing with Brian Griese was tough, but we had no idea it would age him so fast.

The ambulance crew who picked up a dying runner during the Chicago Marathon apparently got lost on the way to a hospital. As if that weren’t bad enough, the extra driving around added an additional 25:13 to the runner’s overall time.

Second overall draft pick Kevin Durant has been reduced to hobbling around on crutches after severely spraining his ankle. It’s uncertain whether the news will cause Seattle’s lone season ticket holder to demand a refund.

Browns rookie Brady Quinn was forced to wear a USC football jersey during a recent interview after losing a bet to former Trojans QB Rodney Peete. It could have been worse. He could have been forced to wear a Notre Dame jersey.

Allen Iverson is out of the Nuggets lineup after injuring his left quadriceps in practice. Sadly, this injury could easily have been prevented if team officials had bothered to listen to Iverson’s stance on practice.

The Heat have traded perpetually out of shape forward Antoine Walker to the Timberwolves. Now that he’s in Minnesota, Walker will have no choice but to start running simply to stay warm.

The Tour de France is expected to have a whole new look for 2008. According to organizers, the event’s new course will be just three and a half blocks long in order to accommodate cyclists who aren’t on HGH.

Kobe Bryant is angry with Lakers GM Mitch Kupchak, whom he believes is blocking a potential trade with unreasonable demands. It must be so frustrating when someone else’s unreasonable demands get in the way of your own.

Sacramento Kings guard Mike Bibby will miss the first six weeks of the regular season after tearing a ligament in his left thumb. Luckily his middle finger is still okay so he can continue communicating with his critics.

Competitive eater Joey Chestnut set a new record by devouring 103 small hamburgers in only 8 minutes. A jubilant Chestnut celebrated afterwards by drinking 55 bottles of Pepto Bismol in just under 3 minutes.

The Boston Red Sox are on top of the world after winning their second World Series championship in four years. And here’s the really good news: we won’t have to watch Jonathan Papelbon dance for another 12 months.

You've Got To Be Joking

Sit back and relax as you enjoy this week’s sports shorts.

Tony Gwynn is the latest athlete to have his image placed on a Wheaties box. It’s believed to be the first time that the cereal’s spokesmodel will have a higher fat content than the cereal itself.

John Salley, Charissa Thompson and Rob Dibble are heading to Hot Springs, Arkansas for a special taping of the Best Damn Sports Show Period. Not only will it be the first time many locals will get to meet a celebrity, it will also be the first time they’ll get to meet someone with a full set of teeth.

Detroit Pistons forward Rasheed Wallace was spotted at Saturday's fight between Winky Wright and Bernard Hopkins. It’s believed to be the first time he’s witnessed a fight without joining into the fray.

Seattle Supersonics forward Kevin Durant has inked a lucrative endorsement deal with Upper Deck. It’s a natural fit since the company’s trading cards are nearly as one-dimensional as he is.

Stephon Marbury has expressed interest in playing in Italy. What a great idea. I’ve never been convinced that English was his first language anyhow.

The FBI is investigating Tim Donaghy, an NBA referee who allegedly bet on basketball games. The scandal goes a long way in explaining how the Knicks managed to win more than 10 games.

Former world champion pole vaulter Giuseppe Gibilisco has been banned for two years for his alleged role in a doping case. Something tells us he’ll eventually rise above his detractors.

Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban defended the NBA’s integrity on one of his recent blogs. The incident is believed to represent the first time that the words Mark Cuban and integrity have been uttered in the same sentence.

NHL commissioner Gary Bettman is expected to recommend to the Board of Governors that the league expand by two teams. That’s wonderful news for the residents of Chicago who have been waiting for a professional team for more than a decade.